A re-post, because it's still so funny:
Another update from the world of stupid property damage: a thirty-year-old DUI and 'felony property damage' suspect actually TRYING to destroy a garage door.
Normally people just do it accidentally through their own incompetence and drunkenness. But no, this man forcefully rammed his huge black SUV into a woman's home repeatedly, allegedly screaming obscenities, before screeching off leaving thousands of dollars of property damage in his wake.
According to the witness, he shouted "And that's what you get, you b****!" as he pulled away. The relationship past or present between the arrested man and the victim of this crime is unknown, but one must wonder what a garage door could have possibly done to him to deserve such treatment.
Oh, on second thought- it was probably the HOMEOWNER he was talking to. But still.
And apparently this idiot had a history- his driver's license had already been suspended for five whole years thanks to other DUI convictions. And get this- when he was pulled over after someone saw him careening along the highway, he denied driving at all. When the police finally got him steady enough to take a breathalyzer test, he blew a .23, so far above the legal limit that he should have been in the hospital for alcohol poisoning.
In fact, this guy's apparently such an alcoholic that this is his third DUI. In combination with the new battery and criminal property damage charges, he's looking at a lot of time, most likely.